Mom shaming is something that baffles me to no end. We are all out here, fighting to stay alive in this jungle we call motherhood, and all some moms want to do is tell others how they are doing it all wrong. Who in the hell are you? Mary? Unless your child was sent for us, then keep your nose out of the other Survivors' business. I will vote you out of our tribe, Judgy Judy.
First up... vaccine trolls. These are moms on both sides of this heated debate that either act like you are Casey Anthony for vaccinating your kid against horrible illnesses, or are terrified that an unvaccinated human may give their precious Penelope the plague. There is a happy medium, folks. And if you feel so strongly one way or the other, then practice your own beliefs with your family and I will continue to take care of mine. I'm pro vax... with a delayed schedule. I know some moms who don't vax at all, and others who would rather get it done in one visit, so they get three or four at once. I'm not saying my way is right. I happen to believe there is a reason for the decline in measles, mumps, and rubella since 1963, but that's neither here nor there. I am, however, saying that if you tell me your kid isn't vaccinated, I am not going to put on a hazmat suit and head for the door. The drama is strong, girls. Do your research and choose the best option for your own little people.
Next up... feeding trolls. "Oh my God!! You don't breastfeed?!? Your kid is going to be sick for the first five years of life and will probably have stunted growth and a lisp forever." This is both ridiculous and untrue. There has been a lot of research and development to make formula as close to breastmilk as possible, and there isn't a damn thing wrong with someone popping a bottle in her baby's mouth for whatever reason she deems necessary. As long as that bottle isn't filled with Coke Zero, I ain't asking a thing. I literally had a Kroger employee shame me for not "at least trying to breastfeed my baby" when I bought formula for the first time. She was 4 months old and I had been crying about it all day. I'm a neurotic stressball and drink about 5 ml of water per day. Milk production quickly became an issue. Put your nose where it goes, ladies- in your own beeswax.
The last type of troll for the day... the "but do you work?" Troll. I am a working mom. Sometimes I wish that I weren't. I think I would dig that gig for about a week. I envy the moms who get to pick their kids up at 2:15 each day and have things together around the house when everyone gets home. Our house resembles a youth detention center occasionally after work and school- with some doing dishes and others pooper scooping the yard. (And the littlest one running the whole operation, no doubt.) If I were at home all day, they wouldn't get to do all that fun stuff! Learn 'em young, right?! Clearly, I am kind of joking, but one thing my kids won't grow up to be is inconsiderate or lazy. Other times I am thankful for my career and my family's understanding of it. Mom shaming a woman for going to work is the dumbest thing I've heard since November. The bridge is that way 👉
Whether you are a young mom or an older mom, a regular birth or a cesarean mom, a breastfeeder or a bottle pusher, a vaccinator or not (Sidebar: I just said "vaccinator" in Arnold Schwarzenegger voice when I typed that), I tip my two-day-old, messy bun to you, ma'am. We try to do our best to keep these nuggets healthy and happy. It would all be quite a bit easier if we supported each other on our trip through the jungle.