dirty laundry for real

From Mt. Foldmore to Mt. Washmore, one may think they are on a family vacation to the Rockies when coming to stay at the Jones castle. Laundry is my nemesis... and here are the bones:

1. Don't, I repeat, DO NOT put clean shit in my laundry room. If I have to wash Spider Bear's pajama pants ONE more time because you are "cleaning" your room I will lose it. And it ain't gonna be pretty. SB is completely potty trained and therefore doesn't need his jammies washed weekly. Throwing a folded shirt in the laundry is also a big problem that little people can catch a charge for in my house. R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me. I don't do laundry for my health, I do it when we are out of underpants. Thanks in advance, fam.

2. Shout out to the moms who wash most loads of laundry more than once before they graduate to the dryer. Not because you want it to be extra clean, but because you had some things come up and er... forgot (?) to switch it over. 104 loads of laundry per container, pshhhhh, my ass! 52 at best in this house. How many times have I been in the middle of doing something and gone "damnit! I did it again!"? I had good intentions when I started it. I'm also a cereal fluffer. I feel like if the dryer is fluffing and doing its job, who am I to stop it to fold the clothes?! That turns into a 5x fluff job per load. Our clothes are extra fluffy. And wrinkled. 🤣

3. The traveling pile is a real mystery to me. I put clean clothes on the bed with the thought that I certainly can't sleep like that, so I will be forced to tackle Mt. Foldmore before my head hits the pillow. In reality, the pile travels from bed to floor and bed to floor approximately 12 times before the next time our favorite visitor comes over. (That would be cleaning Kristi. Yeah.... judge me all you want... I sacrifice two to four dinners out a month so someone else will come clean my house while I'm at work. It's freaking magical and if you are a working mom and have never done it, you should try it at least once if possible. You may never go back.) The only reason the pile gets put away at that point is because there is just no where to move it to make it out of her way... and because I don't want her to know the truth about my laundry problem.

4. Lastly, if I take the time to fold the laundry, and the toddler (or the dogs) comes in while I'm in the shower or something and unfolds the laundry that took me two weeks to tackle , we gonna have a bad morning. Cuteness can only get you so far. She's pretty stinking cute, but laundry also sucks pretty stinking bad. My mother in law has suggested that I do one load of laundry per day to solve my problems. That sounds like my own personal hell. I'd rather just watch a lifetime movie marathon and face my problems with a glass of wine (or 6) on a Sunday afternoon.

Today is Monday, and replacement Kristi is coming tomorrow so I need to cut this short and go fold some clothes. 👚👕👖👔👗👘 (<--- I get so mad when my favorite Kimono is dirty.) Fluff on mamas!! Memories are more important than unwrinkled clothes!

xoxo

CJ

#laundrysucks #theanxietymom #winethoughts #thingstoworkon